Friday, June 1, 2007

Life's A Soap Opera

**Please note**
This blog has some cursing and sex...it's a soap ya know. And some of the story is me poking fun at some celebs so if you are fans, sorry, it's all in fun.

Life really IS a soap opera. Let's get right to it and meet our happy little band of players for this challenge.
The 'dudes' ... We have the moody, never dye your hair blonde again, Colin Farrell, movie star, Irish hot head. And the deep voiced lead singer from the Finnish band H.I.M., Ville Valo ... musican, brooding poet and artist, awesomely tattooed hottie, as well as my own personal obsesson.
And the 'chics' ... Miss Naomi Campbell, haughty supermodel, court ordered boot camp participant. Amy (I'm so Goth) Lee ... lead singer of Evanescence, hussy , back stabber... blah blah blah.... And me of course, Deb ... mild mannered (usually) , Ville obsessed fan girl.
So kids... on to week one.......

DEB'S PLACE

Yep there I am, me and my smokin' Sim bod ...(smile) Just chillin' ...eagerly waiting for my Welcome Wagon guests. Smells breath, checks butt in mirror, mabye a couple of quick crunches before he...ermmm 'they' show up... ok I'm ready

Why Hello Mr. Valo ... (swoon)


Hmmm, I was hoping my mad dance skills would get Ville's attenion a little bit more, ... oh well no rush, the games have just begun.

Moody Colin decides to read now that Ville has joined in the dancin'

Deb - Naomi, seriously girl come have some salad.

Naomi - Hmmm, I don't know, today is a 200 calorie day.

Ville - Naomi, your plate of air is getting cold, eat.


A little later I decide to go check out the local park. I see all my new friends are there as well as some chic I hadn't met yet. But I know who she is ... Amy Lee ... Blah.

Hey!! ... is that skank talking smack about me to Ville???

Deb - Who you badmouthing? Beoytch, take that...

COLIN'S PLACE

Colin - Hey guys, come on and have a drink.

While everyone was creating massive amounts of drama I was being a good Irish boy. I met a fine young lass ... don't hurt that she is rich either. Sure we've only known each other for a couple of days but I figured why not move on in with me. Two's company right???

Colin - I love you ... umm... what's your name again?

Colin - Sigh... I really don't see why I need a job... What's her name already has a good paying job.

Tori - Well for one you knocked me up! You expect me to work too? And my name is Tori!!

Gasp!! Colin...you dog, Amy?? Ewwww.


Colin - Oh yeah, who's wants a piece of me now!?


Colin, go back inside... fight the temptation... you have a baby on the way man!!

Amy - Nice undies. So ummm, Tori is sleeping right?


Yes Colin... that is your brain on Amy....



NAOMI'S PLACE

Naomi - That damn judge, so I have a habit of throwing things at people... is that really something to send someone to boot camp over? Then again, I'm sure I must have burned off a good 3000 calories today.

Amy - So uh... where is your sandwich?

Naomi - it's right here in my hand. It's an air sandwich, fat free, calorie free, matter free food... Mmmmmmm!

Naomi - you know Amy... you could use with a little LESS bread in your diet.. you sort of have chipmunk cheeks.

Gee Amy, maybe shoo away the dog from you friends couch no??

A few quick crunches before bed to work off the air food.



VILLE'S PLACE

Ummm Ville, you have to take the TV dinner out of the box before you put it in the oven.

Ville - hmmm, Law Enforcement or Musician? Obviously I'll be taking the mucian job, this pirate outfit is just too rockin' for rookie patrol.

Wow, Ville really knows how to greet the Welcome Wagon guests. Looks like Colin left his pregnant girlfriend at home and Amy is whoring it up with him.

Deb - must not drool on Ville.

Deb - Oh my God Ville... I have ALL your albums! Did you get my gift of H.P. Lovecraft dirt?

Ville - Oh wow that was you? I love that dirt... very unique fan gift I must say. And I love H.P. Lovecrafts stories.

Ok enough talk... Woo hooo.. (don't drool, don't drool)


Deb - Naomi girl.... I polished that sucker like Aladin's lamp...

Naomi - I wan't to polish someone's lamp...

Gasp.. Ville .. .. .. .. "NOoooooooooooo!" Not freakin' AMY!!

Deb - Oh what the hell? Amy you are going DOWN! ... and not on Ville either!




AMY'S PLACE

For some odd reason only Colin shows up at Amy's place on welcoming day. (Ha-ha!)

Colin - Soccer rocks .. you have any booze?


Amy - Hey aren't you that hussy that threw a drink on me? You better back off beoytch, do YOU know who I AM??? Better yet ... do you know who I'm here with??

Ville - Amy you look so hot in that corsett.

Amy - why thank you lover...(fake giggle)

Deb - Ville how could you!!??

Amy - guess who's 'Ha-ha-ing' now

Colin - Amy how could you!!??

Ville - Huh?

Deb - Die bitch!

Amy - No you die bitch!

Deb - damn it... sob.... I'm going home... to work out

Amy - take that loser, told you not to mess with me!

Amy - sigh my stalker.. I mean Colin is here....

Amy - are you kidding me? You came here, now you are going to give me the cold shoulder... in my own house??


Colin - I loved you... umm... er.. .. AMY! I loved you Amy.

Amy - look babe, that's the just how things are in the rock world, no hard feelings,...we can still get naughty when your girlfriend is working.

Colin - I don't roll like that! You broke my heart .. I'm going home to drown my sorrows in beer.

Amy - Deb you skank... I know you've been kicking over my trash can... do I need to kick your ass .... again?? Get off my property... now!

Amy - Good night Ville... I had a wonderful time, I'm still feeling all tingly and flushed.

Snicker... wait until that Deb finds out about 'this' little surprise....

6 comments:

lissabry said...

ROFL that was hilarious love the drama with you and Amy Lee and isnt it so funny how Colin was cheatin but still so heartbroken and angry with her too . Oh and gotta love those air sandwiches LOL

Roo said...

Oy so many calories in the air food, good thing she did those crunches *giggle*
that was lots of fun to read! that skank Amy going after your man.. how rude!

Fairy D said...

Too Funny. I cannot wait to see what happens next. Deb you have got to get Amy and get her good.

Twoyys4me said...

lol.. that was great, love Colin, he's working his way around the houses.
Naomi and her 'air food' had me cracking up.
Great story..:)

SirenPrincess said...

This story was so funny. I like all of the cheating and woohooing around. Please update soon.

Ziese52 said...

Oh my this is too funny. All that slapping already! Hope to have more to read soon